Kering airmata
Habis tak sisa
Lumpuh tubuh merata
Diujung nadir
Kematianpun mampir
Darah dan perih membanjir
Tunduk menyiksa
Tegakpun terluka
Membunuh jiwa tewaskan raga
Tenggorok tercekat
Bibir memucat
Memanggil malaikat
Datang mendekat
Berhenti jalani yg pekat
Sudahi palsu yg kuat
Akhiri dosa yg lekat
Mulai, mulai dan mulai
Lepas topengmu
Peluk warasmu
Sembuhi gilamu
Robohkan gengsi
Runtuhkan ego
Relakan diri
Sudahi, sudahi, sudahi
Selamatkan dirimu.
Kasihani jiwamu.
Sudahilah palsumu.
January 25, 2011
January 10, 2011
one morning on a free way
Aku memutuskan masuk ke salah satu kendaraan yg sedang melaju sendat di kemacetan free way, kemudian duduk disamping pengemudinya dan mulai memperhatikan, seorang perempuan sedang berkonsentrasi mendengarkan lirik lagu balada mengalun dari stereonya.
---
He put it on me, I put it on
Like there was nothing wrong
It didn't fit, it wasn't right
Wasn't just the size
They say you know when you know
I don't know
I didn't feel the fairytale feeling, no
Am I a stupid girl
For even dreaming that I could?
If its not like the movie
That's how it should be
---
Padahal aku hanya menoleh sesaat melirik kotak cd berjudul sampul album Teenage Dream di pojok dashboard, tiba-tiba perempuan sebelahku sudah bergerak mengambil kacamata hitam utk menutupi wajahnya yg mulai basah, memencet tombol repeat on pd lagu yg sedang terdengar dan meninggikan volume sampai level maksimal.
Tanpa bisa ku protes, aku ikut larut dalam kesedihannya.
Kuamati sebentar2 ia menyenderkan keningnya ke setir, diam beberapa lama sampai klakson kendaraan dibelakang terpaksa menyalak krn klakson pelan tdk akan bs menyaingi lagu yg sdg memenuhi kabin telinga.
Aku mencoba membaca wajahnya, menelusuri masa lalunya, memahami sifatnya dan memasuki ke alam pikirannya... dan, rentetan pengalaman hidup tergambar jelas.
Akhirnya setelah lagu yg sama terulang hampir ke 9 kalinya, aku memutuskan untuk pergi meninggalkan perempuan ini. Dengan sejumput rasa sesal karena telah membuang waktu menemani dia, aku terbang tanpa membuka pintu kendaraan (sama seperti cara aku masuk sebelumnya tadi)...
Perempuan ini tdk perlu aku, ia sudah biasa tidak ditemani, hati dan jiwanya bahkan lebih kuat dari aku... Dia akan baik-baik saja, seperti biasa ia lewati selama ini. Aku belum pernah sepercaya ini pada manusia. Tidak pernah.
Lebih baik aku manfaatkan waktu ku menemui manusia lain yg sedang benar2 membutuhkan aku, yg bs kutularkan kekuatan hatiku ;
hhmmm... mungkin melayang menuju surabaya menemui seorang istri yg sedang menanti belas kasihan utk tidak di talak,
atau... menuju ke sebuah apartemen seorang suami yg baru saja berpisah dari keluarga kecilnya,
atau... ku datangi kuala lumpur menemani seorang tkw yg wajahnya hangus terbakar,
atau... terbang lebih jauh ke palestina menemani anak2 korban kekerasan perang...
Akan lebih berguna daripada menemani perempuan kesepian dalam perjalanannya menuju kantor. Perempuan sinting tapi perkasa.
Bah...
Buang waktu...
---
He put it on me, I put it on
Like there was nothing wrong
It didn't fit, it wasn't right
Wasn't just the size
They say you know when you know
I don't know
I didn't feel the fairytale feeling, no
Am I a stupid girl
For even dreaming that I could?
If its not like the movie
That's how it should be
---
Padahal aku hanya menoleh sesaat melirik kotak cd berjudul sampul album Teenage Dream di pojok dashboard, tiba-tiba perempuan sebelahku sudah bergerak mengambil kacamata hitam utk menutupi wajahnya yg mulai basah, memencet tombol repeat on pd lagu yg sedang terdengar dan meninggikan volume sampai level maksimal.
Tanpa bisa ku protes, aku ikut larut dalam kesedihannya.
Kuamati sebentar2 ia menyenderkan keningnya ke setir, diam beberapa lama sampai klakson kendaraan dibelakang terpaksa menyalak krn klakson pelan tdk akan bs menyaingi lagu yg sdg memenuhi kabin telinga.
Aku mencoba membaca wajahnya, menelusuri masa lalunya, memahami sifatnya dan memasuki ke alam pikirannya... dan, rentetan pengalaman hidup tergambar jelas.
Akhirnya setelah lagu yg sama terulang hampir ke 9 kalinya, aku memutuskan untuk pergi meninggalkan perempuan ini. Dengan sejumput rasa sesal karena telah membuang waktu menemani dia, aku terbang tanpa membuka pintu kendaraan (sama seperti cara aku masuk sebelumnya tadi)...
Perempuan ini tdk perlu aku, ia sudah biasa tidak ditemani, hati dan jiwanya bahkan lebih kuat dari aku... Dia akan baik-baik saja, seperti biasa ia lewati selama ini. Aku belum pernah sepercaya ini pada manusia. Tidak pernah.
Lebih baik aku manfaatkan waktu ku menemui manusia lain yg sedang benar2 membutuhkan aku, yg bs kutularkan kekuatan hatiku ;
hhmmm... mungkin melayang menuju surabaya menemui seorang istri yg sedang menanti belas kasihan utk tidak di talak,
atau... menuju ke sebuah apartemen seorang suami yg baru saja berpisah dari keluarga kecilnya,
atau... ku datangi kuala lumpur menemani seorang tkw yg wajahnya hangus terbakar,
atau... terbang lebih jauh ke palestina menemani anak2 korban kekerasan perang...
Akan lebih berguna daripada menemani perempuan kesepian dalam perjalanannya menuju kantor. Perempuan sinting tapi perkasa.
Bah...
Buang waktu...
January 5, 2011
all by ...
Hug, not strangle..
Bond, not tied..
Shall, not should..
Hold, not owned..
Talk, not yell
Affection, not lust
Guard, not locked
Self confidence, not selfishness
Forever, not eternal..
All separated by thin line called obligation
All fulfilled by strong attitude called control
All sacrificed by deep maturity called heart
Bond, not tied..
Shall, not should..
Hold, not owned..
Talk, not yell
Affection, not lust
Guard, not locked
Self confidence, not selfishness
Forever, not eternal..
All separated by thin line called obligation
All fulfilled by strong attitude called control
All sacrificed by deep maturity called heart
January 3, 2011
Star Stair Start
Almost everyday I hear my brain's voice whispering to my right ear;
Weby ...
Dare to dream
Wide awake
Own your dreams
With open eyes
Throw the pillows
Forget the mattress
Stand the right up
Make some moves
Believe
And build sleepless dreams
If you hv no idea how to start
Look upon the sky, point 1 star
Pretend that it's a place where you've been dreamin' of
Now, make a stair between you n the star
Step it up.
Don't look back.
Believe.
If you couldn't hear my voice again, good.. weren't means you're gettin closer to the star?
Don't stop and just remember ;
Star,
Stair,
Start.
point a Star
make a Stair
and step a Start ...
Have a wonderful journey Weby, send me messages when you arrived.
I believe you will.
Weby ...
Dare to dream
Wide awake
Own your dreams
With open eyes
Throw the pillows
Forget the mattress
Stand the right up
Make some moves
Believe
And build sleepless dreams
If you hv no idea how to start
Look upon the sky, point 1 star
Pretend that it's a place where you've been dreamin' of
Now, make a stair between you n the star
Step it up.
Don't look back.
Believe.
If you couldn't hear my voice again, good.. weren't means you're gettin closer to the star?
Don't stop and just remember ;
Star,
Stair,
Start.
point a Star
make a Stair
and step a Start ...
Have a wonderful journey Weby, send me messages when you arrived.
I believe you will.
January 2, 2011
no worries
Child ...
No worries
She's the one who will keep u
Won't let u go for a second
Child ...
No worries
She will take good care of u
Won't give u afraid for a clap
Child ...
No worries
She will watch u grow
Won't skip it for a blink
You, you, you fathers
Escape, run, hide, burn or die ...
Whatever.
You, you, you mothers
Regret, shut up, sleep or suicide ...
Whatever.
Just let her do this heavy duties
The darkest features she ever imagined,
You all, the chaos parents ...
No worries
Just stop your fights, violences, abuses, screams, and put the guns down for awhile ...
Watch her.
She'll achieve highest scores;
with the widest chest she'd do perfectly sacrifice ...
with the bravest mind she'd do consistently conscious ...
with the brightest heart she'd do surely feel ...
Joyful
Great full
Peaceful.
No worries
She's the one who will keep u
Won't let u go for a second
Child ...
No worries
She will take good care of u
Won't give u afraid for a clap
Child ...
No worries
She will watch u grow
Won't skip it for a blink
You, you, you fathers
Escape, run, hide, burn or die ...
Whatever.
You, you, you mothers
Regret, shut up, sleep or suicide ...
Whatever.
Just let her do this heavy duties
The darkest features she ever imagined,
You all, the chaos parents ...
No worries
Just stop your fights, violences, abuses, screams, and put the guns down for awhile ...
Watch her.
She'll achieve highest scores;
with the widest chest she'd do perfectly sacrifice ...
with the bravest mind she'd do consistently conscious ...
with the brightest heart she'd do surely feel ...
Joyful
Great full
Peaceful.
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